Things Are NOT Where They Are Supposed To Be!

So we are missing some dog poo. I know, I know...most people would be HAPPY to be missing it. Or perhaps missing it would not be the best way to describe it. Let me explain. We have this..AHEM...wonderful dog named Duke. Cutest Pug you will ever set your eyes on. He, however, only sets his eyes on MY DECK when he has to POO. Won't poop in the grass to save his life. SO...I spend my days, in so many ways, cleaning up sh**... that is my job. WOW, I think I just wrote the beginning of a really awesome song...but I digress. So our little Dukey....funny, ain't it, how his name is the exact metaphor for POOP...but again, I digress...he does his thing, near the top of the steps on our deck. Y'all know I have 3 kids, right...and y'all know the inevitable mess that is coming your..I mean MY way...right? Well, before My Three Sons can trample through the dodo (HA!), I walk into the house, grab a paper towel and march myself right back out to the deck where I find.........nothing.

WHERE did the Dukey doody (HA!) go? I check the bottoms of six feet....nothin. I check the dog. Nothin. I look at MY feet. Nothin. I twirl around in a circle, looking desperately for the missing poo as if it is hiding from me. N*O*T*H*I*N*G. Now I KNOW it could not have gotten up and walked away. Nor could it have fallen through the cracks in the deck. I seriously think I am losing my mind.

So I come in the house and sit my THOROUGHLY inspected children down in front of the t.v. to watch the movie Beethoven. You know the one...with the big dog. I figure Beethoven on Disney channel will suffice as entertainment while I investigate The Case of the Missing Doody (HA!) a little further. Just for a moment...humor me here...just for a moment, close your eyes and imagine the following scene:

ME: On the deck, bent over, examining every nook and cranny for dog poo.
JACK: Mom...
ME: Yes Jack?
JACK: Why do you have fish in your tummy?
ME: ummmm....well, I did have a fish sandwich for lunch. Is that what you mean honey?
JACK: No...why do moms have fish eggs and frog babies swimming in their tummys?
ME: uuuummmmm...honey bear, can you tell me WHAT you are talking about?
JACK: SIGH! Never mind!!

1 minute later:

ME: Continuing on the quest that is taking over my life.
JAMES: Mom?
ME: Yeah sweetie?
JAMES: How long do goldfish take to turn into babies?
ME: uuummm...I am not sure how long goldfish eggs take to turn into goldfish babies. Why honey?
JAMES: NO MOM! How long does it take for goldfish to TURN INTO BABIES?
ME: uuuummmmm...sweetie pie, can you tell me WHAT you are talking about?
JAMES: Well, on Beethoven, the dad said that there are tiny goldfish eggs that are in mommy's tummys and that there are tadpoles that swim up to them and they hug and make a baby grow in your tummy.
ME: You don't say.......

Needless to say, my search was over. What happened to the dog poo? I will never know. But I do know that Beethoven just took a huge dump right in the middle of my day

The Legacy Left Behind

Have I mentioned that I REALLY love my blog? With 3 kids and an absolutely INSANE schedule, there is little time to document the daily happenings that make up the soul of our family. I am so grateful to have a place like this to quickly, or in some instances, not so quickly, chronicle those events. The little achievements and huge accomplishments...I am hoping that my boys will be able to look back on this blog and see the great things that happened in our family!

So what is it about (almost!) hitting a MAJOR birthday milestone that suddenly causes you to reflect on the legacy that you may be leaving behind?! Some of what I have been thinking lately is pretty morose. Wills, life insurance, all of the things that responsible parents do to insure that their children are taken care of in case of the inevitable. Yes, all of those things will allow them to be taken care of financially, but what things are we leaving behind that tells them about who their parents are? It occurred to me that they have only known one small, albeit IMPORTANT, part of who I am. Mom. They never met the frightened schoolgirl or the rebellious teenager. They haven't experienced my "Terrible Twenty's". They know me as Mommy...the responsible, loving, nurturing, strict (HA!) mother who thinks they are the greatest thing on the planet, and who tells them every night how grateful she is that they are hers.

They have no idea that it took, what seemed like a lifetime, to figure out who I am and what I wanted. That the journey from the scared school girl to the mom I am was not an easy one. For most of my life I questioned who I was supposed to BE. Not only to my parents, friends and to Daryl, but to MYSELF. I wish I could verbalize the internal struggle that occurred; the amount of effort it took to learn that I am a good person. The frustration at the amount of time I spent so selfishly looking inward for things that I should have had as a child. I realize now that THAT was a HUGE waste of time. A waste of time in the sense that I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN these things and spent that time ACHIEVING my goals instead of SEARCHING for what they were.

I know now, with every fiber of my being, that I was meant to be a mom; that the children that I have are the greatest gift I have ever been given and that there is NOTHING on this planet more important to me than their health, happiness and future. That the journey that got me to where I am today, to the PERSON and PARENT I am today is, then, appreciated because it allowed for them to be.

As corny as it sounds, I don't have a crystal ball. I don't have any idea what tomorrow will bring, but I do know that I want one thing to be known: James, Jack and Joseph...be happy...be kind...be loving...but most of all...be you. And know that you are loved.