Nothing Good To Say....

Have you ever heard that saying... I am sure you have..."If you have nothing good to say, say nothing"...kinda what has been going on in my world lately.

Call it a female version of a mid-life-crisis...prolonged episode of PMS...early onset of menopause hormones..whatever you wish...but I have been C~R~A~B~B~Y. Not just your typical "I am kinda tired of cooking and cleaning" kind of crabby...I mean "I hate my life DAMN IT and I am NOT happy about it" kind of crabby.

Unfortunately for me, whenever I start to feel out of sorts with my existence, some greater being usually slaps me back in line. Case in point: a few weeks ago, while in the midst of one of my "episodes", I suddenly and unexpectedly got to visit the ER because of a very painful kidney stone. Had to have surgery and while the week spent on Percocet WAS a nice change of pace, it reminded me that the status quo can be quite enjoyable.

When I realized that I have not blogged in over 3 months, mostly due to the fact that I had nothing nice to say, it got me thinking. Perhaps a change in attitude, as opposed to location, is more of what is needed right now. Maybe I should start thinking about helping my spirit...

SO...in honor of my 40th year, and my quest to better myself, my blog is now going to chronicle not only the goings on of My Three Sons, but also my journey to a better me. Perhaps I should start blogging about the diet that is about to begin; the diet that I have promised myself would culminate in my losing 100 pounds by my 41st year. Hopefully, the goals I have set for myself will allow me to feel better about myself and my world thus making it easier to come up with things to be happy about.

Next up...my list of things to accomplish in year 40.

I guess, in the end, I DID have something good to say

Things Are NOT Where They Are Supposed To Be!

So we are missing some dog poo. I know, I know...most people would be HAPPY to be missing it. Or perhaps missing it would not be the best way to describe it. Let me explain. We have this..AHEM...wonderful dog named Duke. Cutest Pug you will ever set your eyes on. He, however, only sets his eyes on MY DECK when he has to POO. Won't poop in the grass to save his life. SO...I spend my days, in so many ways, cleaning up sh**... that is my job. WOW, I think I just wrote the beginning of a really awesome song...but I digress. So our little Dukey....funny, ain't it, how his name is the exact metaphor for POOP...but again, I digress...he does his thing, near the top of the steps on our deck. Y'all know I have 3 kids, right...and y'all know the inevitable mess that is coming your..I mean MY way...right? Well, before My Three Sons can trample through the dodo (HA!), I walk into the house, grab a paper towel and march myself right back out to the deck where I find.........nothing.

WHERE did the Dukey doody (HA!) go? I check the bottoms of six feet....nothin. I check the dog. Nothin. I look at MY feet. Nothin. I twirl around in a circle, looking desperately for the missing poo as if it is hiding from me. N*O*T*H*I*N*G. Now I KNOW it could not have gotten up and walked away. Nor could it have fallen through the cracks in the deck. I seriously think I am losing my mind.

So I come in the house and sit my THOROUGHLY inspected children down in front of the t.v. to watch the movie Beethoven. You know the one...with the big dog. I figure Beethoven on Disney channel will suffice as entertainment while I investigate The Case of the Missing Doody (HA!) a little further. Just for a moment...humor me here...just for a moment, close your eyes and imagine the following scene:

ME: On the deck, bent over, examining every nook and cranny for dog poo.
JACK: Mom...
ME: Yes Jack?
JACK: Why do you have fish in your tummy?
ME: ummmm....well, I did have a fish sandwich for lunch. Is that what you mean honey?
JACK: No...why do moms have fish eggs and frog babies swimming in their tummys?
ME: uuuummmmm...honey bear, can you tell me WHAT you are talking about?
JACK: SIGH! Never mind!!

1 minute later:

ME: Continuing on the quest that is taking over my life.
JAMES: Mom?
ME: Yeah sweetie?
JAMES: How long do goldfish take to turn into babies?
ME: uuummm...I am not sure how long goldfish eggs take to turn into goldfish babies. Why honey?
JAMES: NO MOM! How long does it take for goldfish to TURN INTO BABIES?
ME: uuuummmmm...sweetie pie, can you tell me WHAT you are talking about?
JAMES: Well, on Beethoven, the dad said that there are tiny goldfish eggs that are in mommy's tummys and that there are tadpoles that swim up to them and they hug and make a baby grow in your tummy.
ME: You don't say.......

Needless to say, my search was over. What happened to the dog poo? I will never know. But I do know that Beethoven just took a huge dump right in the middle of my day

The Legacy Left Behind

Have I mentioned that I REALLY love my blog? With 3 kids and an absolutely INSANE schedule, there is little time to document the daily happenings that make up the soul of our family. I am so grateful to have a place like this to quickly, or in some instances, not so quickly, chronicle those events. The little achievements and huge accomplishments...I am hoping that my boys will be able to look back on this blog and see the great things that happened in our family!

So what is it about (almost!) hitting a MAJOR birthday milestone that suddenly causes you to reflect on the legacy that you may be leaving behind?! Some of what I have been thinking lately is pretty morose. Wills, life insurance, all of the things that responsible parents do to insure that their children are taken care of in case of the inevitable. Yes, all of those things will allow them to be taken care of financially, but what things are we leaving behind that tells them about who their parents are? It occurred to me that they have only known one small, albeit IMPORTANT, part of who I am. Mom. They never met the frightened schoolgirl or the rebellious teenager. They haven't experienced my "Terrible Twenty's". They know me as Mommy...the responsible, loving, nurturing, strict (HA!) mother who thinks they are the greatest thing on the planet, and who tells them every night how grateful she is that they are hers.

They have no idea that it took, what seemed like a lifetime, to figure out who I am and what I wanted. That the journey from the scared school girl to the mom I am was not an easy one. For most of my life I questioned who I was supposed to BE. Not only to my parents, friends and to Daryl, but to MYSELF. I wish I could verbalize the internal struggle that occurred; the amount of effort it took to learn that I am a good person. The frustration at the amount of time I spent so selfishly looking inward for things that I should have had as a child. I realize now that THAT was a HUGE waste of time. A waste of time in the sense that I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN these things and spent that time ACHIEVING my goals instead of SEARCHING for what they were.

I know now, with every fiber of my being, that I was meant to be a mom; that the children that I have are the greatest gift I have ever been given and that there is NOTHING on this planet more important to me than their health, happiness and future. That the journey that got me to where I am today, to the PERSON and PARENT I am today is, then, appreciated because it allowed for them to be.

As corny as it sounds, I don't have a crystal ball. I don't have any idea what tomorrow will bring, but I do know that I want one thing to be known: James, Jack and Joseph...be happy...be kind...be loving...but most of all...be you. And know that you are loved.

No...No!...NO!!!

Holy Hannah! has the summer gone fast. Well, in my blog world, anyway. In my real world time seems to be moving in slow motion. We have done so much, and nothing all at the same time! We celebrated Joey's 2nd birthday. The boys have been going to T-Ball/Baseball every Saturday. We have started to accumulate all the necessary paraphernalia for school that is starting in a month. Jack has recently had his training wheels taken off of his bike and is cruising around the neighborhood like an old pro! He scares me with the athletic prowess he shows already. James is spending a lot of time with Phineas and Ferb...but the one who takes the cake is my precious angel baby Joey. Let's see....what is there to say about the youngest of My Three Sons.



The boy is hell on wheels right now. Seriously. Someone come and babysit for a while. This child can move with such lightning speed, I CANNOT keep up with him. Maybe it is old age...or maybe he is going to set a land speed record someday, but the SECOND I *think* I have distracted him from destroying some part of the house HE IS ON TO SOMETHING ELSE. Here is a synopsis of the verbiage used with Joseph....all in one day:

• Joseph, we will have breakfast in a minute. Please do not climb on the shelves for that box of cereal.
  
• Joey...I said put down the box of cereal!
  
• NO NO! Do NOT climb to the ceiling on the shelving unit!
  
• NO! You CANNOT swing from the ceiling fan!
  
• You MAY NOT open that box of cereal!
  
• JOEY! PLEASE do not dump the entire box of cereal on the floor!
  
• JOSEPH! If you are going to dump the cereal on the floor, at least help me off of the shelving! I am stuck up here from trying to get you down!
  
• JOSEPH ROBERT! DO NOT stick your PB&J sandwich to the sliding glass door!
  
• No I do not think it is funny that you can write your name in peanut butter on the window!
  
• Joey...you are FAR too little to be climbing up on the counter.
  
• NO! Air freshener is NOT to play with! You CANNOT climb up to get it!
  
• NO NO! The dog will go blind if you spray air freshener in his eyes!
  
• JOSEPH! You may NOT dump out the garbage can on the floor!
  
• You CANNOT force feed the dog a moldy green bean!
  
• NO NO!! YOU CANNOT EAT ONE EITHER!
  
• Joey...you need to put your diaper back on..and how did you get naked so quickly?!?!
  
• No Joseph...the potty is THAT WAY!
  
• JOSEPH! DO NOT TINKLE IN THE LIVING ROOM!
  
• JOSEPH ROBERT LINGE!! YOU HAD BETTER NOT SQUAT RIGHT THERE!
  
• If you laugh at me one more time young man, you are going to be in BIG trouble!

Is it any wonder that I have a temper tantrum every night about 5 pm! If someone could spare a tranquilizer......ahem.....I would really appreciate it!

Top 5...

TOP 5 WAYS YOU KNOW YOU ARE A MOM!

1) You can create a monster trap out of plastic bags and tape in order to ease the worries of a 5 year old.

2) You go to the world's largest shopping mall and all you come home with is 4 pairs of Baby Gap socks for the 2 year old, a bag of train shaped cookie cutters for the 5 year old and Beartie Bott's Every Flavor Beans for the 7 year old who is reading Harry Potter. And a book on how to survive raising three boys.

3) Even though you are so sunburned you look like a piece of fried chicken, you still gather your children and go to a water park.

4) You play bingo until your ears bleed for family game night.

5) You take a 10 minute, stroke inducing, horror filled ride down a water slide to show how much fun they are. TO YOUR KIDS